As the summer season approaches I get asked a very common question ” Don’t you get hot wearing all those clothes ?” Having never experienced wearing short sleeves outside makes it much easier for me to answer this question . It is similar to someone who has never experienced eating chocolate , they don’t crave it because they have never tasted it . This said however does not mean that we as veiled woman do not wish we could just put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and go outside, I have asked my self what that experience would be like several times .
But what I want to share with you today is how I as Esraa understand and live with my veil during the summer season . Yes we do got hot , yes we cant wait to go home and take our veil off , but every morning when I wear my clothes I think what an amazing test we have to go through every single day and to be tested daily is essential for me because it really makes me reflect and think more often about my veil and my religion .
Imagine you had a test every other day , wouldn’t you put more effort to study and to improve your score? Maybe , some might choose to just forget about it and carry on . But for me being tested on the small details of my life has really made me more disciplined and has created a mechanism for me to always enjoy the little things in life,(especially the air condition which we as veiled women appreciate more than others ! )
I have always been a strong believer that God has a miraculous way in teaching and guiding us in everything we do and recently I learned a valuable lesson about human beings whom never fail to amuse me . I traveled to Serbia last month to speak about my blog at a social media conference called ” Share” . I went there convinced that I was going to be judged , that I was going to be stared upon , I went there as a victim.
I arrived to Serbia and was waiting for the first pair of eyes that would stare at me to further victimize my self . I began counting how many people were staring , I even passed this contagious idea to my friend whom I asked to count with me as well . It wasn’t until the night before my speech when I was rehearsing in front of the mirror that I realized what was going on . This conspiracy theory that was in my head had to stop , I looked straight into the mirror and asked myself ” what are you doing ? ”
In a few hours I was going to be on a stage to tell people how I fought discrimination and how we shouldn’t judge others when in fact that was all I was doing throughout the past week . Before trying to understand my self ( which is an almost impossible job ) I tried to understand why is that these people were starring and I came to the following conclusion: It was only normal that they starred , they haven’t seen a veiled woman in their country for the past 30 years or so , it would be abnormal if they didn’t.
I went on stage the day after and I confessed to what I had been doing and I felt liberated from my self. Sometimes we drown ourselves in our ideas and thoughts which we hold onto so tight and which we refuse to give up. Sometimes we refuse to ” Share” our fears our ideas and and sometimes we refuse to see things from other peoples perspective .
Going to Serbia was Gods way of telling me you have to understand the other and he sent me to a country where I knew little about the other so that I treat them them as humans not as Serbians or as people who were starring . What I learned during my week in Serbia was valuable lesson ” Sharing is not only about us giving it is really about us accepting ”