Tear Drops

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Every Thursday we go to the mosque to read a supplication ( Do3a2) called do3a2 Kumaeil . It is a beautiful ritual that I like to call the “cleansing of the soul “. It is almost like reading an inspiring quote that really makes you think except that Do3a2 is like reading a thousand inspiring quotes that make you think on a spiritual level and it is abeautiful source of wisdom. There is some sadness associated with Do3a2 because it reminds us of our sins and that we are not as important and powerful as we really think we are, I call this part of the of the Do3a2 “ The wakeup call“.

I have to confess that I do not always focus and enjoy the do3a2 as much as I would have wanted either because I am tired or occupied with work but I swear that there hasn’t been a time when I left the mosque after Do3a2 not feeling better and this in its self is a blessing.

The last time I was in the mosque there were two ten year old girls sitting next to me and in the middle of the do3a2 I began to cry. The two girls looked at me with amusement and I could hear one of them asking the other “Should we be crying as well? “ Her friend replied by saying that she has no clue “ How should I know , but I guess since everyone is crying we should be crying too “ At that moment I stopped focusing in the do3a2 and all my attention was at these two young girls who were trying to understand and to fit in what was going on. They both started to close their eyes and bow their heads hoping that a tear would drop and every five minutes they would take a sneak peak at each other to see if one them had succeeded in her attempt to cry. After 30 minutes of trying they failed, they looked at me to see if I was still crying and when they saw that I was they came up to me and asked me the most beautiful question “ Is it ok if we didn’t cry?”.

These two girls had put so much effort into respecting the do3a2 and had dedicated an entire hour to sit and listen to something they barely understood and by the end of it all they felt guilty that they did not cry. I was jealous that they had so much concern about something that was not even obligatory in Islam and I envied their pure spirit. I left the mosque that day feeling inspired by these girls. Sometimes we do not fully commit ourselves to reading do3a2 or to praying or to reading Quran but we can learn from those who do. I understood that part of why we go to the mosque is because there will definitely be someone who is fully committed to religion, someone who takes a long time to pray and who reads Quran slowly , someone who cries throughout the do3a someone who can inspire us even if they are 10 years old.

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2 responses »

  1. Hello Esraa. I loved your text, which is fact is very inspiring. I could tell you much about this feeling. As you may know I am issued from a mixed family: I could tell you the story of the day my grandpa died, and I went to the Husseiniyeh in Tyr.

  2. Esraa maya farah is Dr. Farah (marketing). Send me your mobile number to the below mail and i will nshallah call you soon 🙂

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